We don't need more love!

4/30/26

“What the world needs now is love, sweet love

It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of

What the world needs now is love, sweet love

No, not just for some but for everyone”

These words, from the 1965 hit by Bacharach and David, certainly evoke feelings and ring sentimental. But is it true?Would a little bit more love help heal our world? Would it bring people together? Would it help calm the heated political rhetoric and rancorous partisan divide?Conventional wisdom says it would. The Talmud suggests it wouldn’t.When thousands of Rabbi Akiva’s students fell to a plague in the second century, the sages of the Talmud suggested that their death was a heavenly punishment, “because they did not treat each other with respect.”The Lubavitcher Rebbe asks a striking question:

Rabbi Akiva is most renowned for his emphasis on the importance of loving each other, famously stating that “Loving your fellow as you love yourself is a foremost principle of the Torah.”

How could it then possibly be that Rabbi Akiva’s students--students of a teacher who preached and embodied love to all--would fail so spectacularly in the core principle their teacher taught?

The answer, says the Lubavitcher Rebbe, is hinted to in the Talmud’s words themselves.

Thanks to their teacher’s guidance, the students indeed had plenty of love for each other. They were punished not because they didn’t treat each other with love. There was no shortage of love.

They were punished “because they didn’t treat each other with respect.”

And respect is a world away from love.

Love means I feel close to you. It means I care about you.

But as a direct consequence of that beautiful closeness, love also means that differences between us can cause tension.

Because we are close, I want us to think similarly, to act similarly, or at the very least not to vote for a political candidate whose views I deem reprehensible!

Respect, on the other hand, means I acknowledge the distance between us. I honor your space and respect your judgment.

Respect means I may not agree with you; I may, in fact, disagree completely. But I respect that you are not me, and that you are entitled to your own views and principles, even if they are utterly objectionable to me.

Love and respect are both crucial elements to every relationship. But each ingredient needs to be in moderation according to the relationship.

A marriage, for example, need a healthy dose of both love and respect. They are both absolutely essential.

In a close friend group, you can probably do with a little less love and a little more respect. But love is still crucial, for without it, you are not friends.

But in society as a whole, we don’t need more love. We don’t need to feel close to everyone. We don’t need everyone to be comfortable in our orbit, nor must we be in theirs.

What we need, desperately, is respect.

On Tuesday, we mark Lag Ba’omer, the day when the plague that killed Rabbi Akiva’s students ceased. That day has been celebrated every year since as a day to honor their memories, and perhaps more importantly, the message their death taught us:

All the world needs is just a little bit of respect.